Boston

Credit ratings have a firm grip on our lives and what we can or can't do. My credit rating is blown to pieces following a long period of illness when I was unable to pay things I owed. This I of course accept but it has now made any application for funds to assist with my training impossible. So tomorrow, I am off to Boston to see Taylor ITEX. I'd never heard of them before now but apparently they may be able to help with my training and more importantly the funding I need. PCV training is not cheap - I need about £2,500. It's a while since I've been to Boston - I try to avoid it if I can as it has one of the worst road layouts I know and the traffic is often horrendous. It's a worth a try though, they may be able to help. I do though have a feeling they'll just tell me everything I already know. I've already sorted out a training provider - I just need the money loaned to me so I can do the training, take my test and start working to pay back the money I owe. Simple really. My frustration with it all stems mainly from the fact that I'm owed money by the training provider I'm taking legal action against and now my credit card company who owe me £950 in overpayments. If I had the money owed me then I'd be at the wheel of a coach in Peterborough training right now...

As an aside, it is sad to note the demise of a well known local bus and coach operator - Carnell's of Long Sutton. They have gone into voluntary liquidation as a result of soaring fuel and operating costs. It's a real shame to see a local company 'go under'. They have been operating since 1969 and provided school bus services and local passenger services throughout the county. I see that the other major operator in the area have taken over their services and that a number of their drivers have found re-employment. I'm sure Carnell's aren't the first and certainly won't be the last to suffer from the extreme operating conditions imposed by our current government.

My digital past

Normally photographs or written diaries would give clues to a person's past. In my case, it's different. Yes there are photographs though these get fewer the further back you go. In my case, it's a box packed full of floppy disks and tapes. I'd retrieved it from the loft yesterday curious to know what was in it. I fished out all the floppy disks, some of them covered in dust and with cryptic labels only I knew the meaning of sometime long ago. I began to read some of them and was surprised to find things such as backups of my e-mail, photographs of pen friends, early electronic diaries and letters - many of which were to and from my early 'electronic lovers'. It was actually quite a shock to find that I had committed so much of my early adult life to digital media. The majority of the disks date back to 1995. I even found a great many projects and documents I had created whilst with my first proper employer. It's all useless today, but interesting nevertheless.
My dilemma now is what to do with them all. My wife knows of their existence but has no idea of what they hold, or the faintest clue of how to read them. Would I be worried about her knowing their contents? Well, yes - the letters would certainly upset her. She gets like that very easily. She'd insist on them being destroyed, of that I have no doubt. For instance, last night the Gadget Show on Channel 5 featured gadgets that could powered by daylight and she got really upset at the fact that I was getting excited over a solar powered camcorder. 'You don't get that excited over me', was her retort. 'You're not portable and solar powered', I replied. We sat in silence for some time after. I really don't want to get rid of any of it but I find myself feeling guilty at keeping this digital cache secret. It's difficult to explain how important it really is to me. It contains so much of who I once was and destroying it would be like destroying a part of me. It is true that back in the early to mid 90's, I did have a life different to my wife's. She is keen to tell me that hers was a life of the outdoors, picking vegetables in the fields and enjoying what nature had to offer. Mine on the other hand was one consumed by TV, electronics and computers. I know I spent most of my time in front of my computer - far more than I do now. I had begun to rely on it for most things - including company - which I know is wrong. Back then though, the Internet was relatively young and it was an exciting time. I will always justify that period in my life as being an important factor in my IT career. Admittedly that's now behind me but I earned good money and lived a good lifestyle as a result.
At the heart of it all was my obsession with collecting. I tried to collect everything I could once, so much in fact that there was a real danger of me falling through my bedroom floor. Much of it is now gone and I have a small den at home which I'm allowed to retreat to occasionally. I was very keen back then to collect what I did and I backed-up as much as I possibly could. The media of the day was tape and floppy disk - each limited in the amount of data they could hold. The tapes I will have a problem reading. They are first generation DAT tapes and I don't currently have a working drive. In addition, I've no idea what format I used to back up the data. A project for another day I think - I've plenty to look at on the floppy disks.
So, do I keep them or destroy them? They have no value to anyone except me. I doubt even if my son would be interested in years to come. He'll have his own life to worry about without wondering what his Dad did way back in 1995. Should I really get rid of them all simply to appease my wife or am I right to want to hang on to my digital past...?

Eurovision

It's that time of the year again and I am once again finding myself looking forward to this year's Eurovision Song Contest. Despite its campness, its crappy songs and outlandish costumes, there's something endearing about it which still manages to draw a huge worldwide audience.
This year, I think we may actually be in with a chance of scoring more than 1 point. Apparently 'Blue' have gone down well in Europe. They are well known and popular. But the favourite this year is, scarily, 'Jedward' who are representing Ireland. Their song 'Lipstick' is awful, really awful, but it has all the qualities required for a typical Eurovision entry and I understand Europe already love them. In fact, there is now a real fear that they could actually win it for their cash-stricken homeland. There are rumors doing the rounds that they were only put forward as Ireland couldn't afford to host it should they win. Oh dear...
One things for sure, it will be entertaining. Graham Norton will no doubt excel with his unique comedic commentary and the scoring will probably be the best bit as normal.
Love it or hate it, Eurovision is as much a part of our culture as fish and chips or a pint of bitter - and it's here to stay so we may as well enjoy it...

Getting away with it

We live in a country where 'getting away with it' is now the norm. I refer to the Potters Bar Rail Inquiry and the news that after 9 years, Network Rail are given a token slap on the wrist for the negligence that caused a commuter train to leave the tracks and plow into a station killing 7 people. It appears that instead of going after the people responsible at the time of the disaster, our wonderful legal system has instead held the current rail maintenance company to account. As they have limited liability, they get a token fine - which incidentally - we are paying for. Now, is it me or does this sound totally ridiculous.
I am totally sympathetic to the views and comments of those who lost loved ones at the hands of Railtrack and I hope you keep up your fight to find justice. Like you, I am disgusted with this country's legal system and its trend for letting people walking away from crime Scot-free.

A beautiful podiatrist and a mindless idiot

Two things to mention today... Firstly I had an appointment at the Johnson Hospital in Spalding this afternoon. This visit was for my feet, specifically to find out if my diabetes has damaged them. It was my first visit to the Podiatric Dept and though I had a good idea of what was involved, I still had a nervous feeling while I waited for my name to be called. The dental department was right opposite where I was sitting. I have an acute fear of dentists so I felt better knowing I could be waiting for a tooth extraction or a filling.
After about ten minutes, my name was called and I followed the voice into a room to find an absolute vision of loveliness. I really didn't have any pre-expectations of what a podiatrist should look like, but it's fair to say I didn't expect what I found. Being happily married, I shouldn't be writing this, I know and if my wife ever reads this, I'm in trouble. My feet were about to be handled by a stunningly beautiful young lady. I can't say anything else and I certainly won't lie. She was beautiful. As she read through the list of medication I take, we joked about the things I had wrong with myself and for a very short time, we were in each other's company and enjoying it. I imagined what it would be like to know her better. It was wrong, of course it was, but there was a longing to find out more and I drifted off to situations and places where we were together.
I was brought back to reality as I felt something cold on my feet. It was some kind of gel which was needed so her probe could detect circulation. She was very gentle and she seemed so interested in me. Of course it was for purely professional reasons, but I couldn't help but imagine how caring she would be in different circumstances. It left me thinking that whoever won her heart would be a very fortunate person indeed.
My feet were given a clean bill of health and she told me she would discharge me as there wasn't anything seriously wrong with them. I detected a tiny hint of reluctance in her voice as she told me this. But she quickly added that I could contact her at any time if I had any problems or needed her help and advice. She printed me off some leaflets on how to look after my feet as I put my shoes and socks back on. She asked if I had any questions - I told her no but that I was glad my feet weren't going to drop off. She laughed and we parted company. I wondered if I would ever hear her laugh again. Probably not, unless something goes wrong with my feet. I expect to her, I was just another patient - a bit younger than she's used to - but a patient nonetheless. But to me, she wasn't just another nurse. She was more than that but she'll never know...

Once again, I am compelled to write about the mindless idiots that are allowed to continue using the roads here in South Lincolnshire. I am absolutely convinced that road safety training in any shape or form is non-existent and that motorists simply drive the way they want to and with no respect for the law of the road, the safety of others or common sense. The latest idiot (a dark blue VW Golf) decided it would be fine to ignore the new 50 mph speed limit imposed on the main road linking Sutton Bridge with Long Sutton and over take me after overtaking another driver. A look of disapproval was met with the now familiar one fingered salute as he disappeared into the distance overtaking everyone else in his path.
My conclusion is clear. If you set a new speed limit, it MUST be enforced.
A few minutes later who should appear in my rear view mirror, so close to the back of the car I could count his teeth, but the same f***ing idiot who had shot past me a few minutes earlier. Once again he was determined to demonstrate his contempt for the law and the safety of others by carrying out another reckless overtaking routine.This time, he left barely an inch between his car and mine and made sure he'd sprayed me with stones and gravel as he sped away. What makes this all the worse is the fact that this dangerous little prick knew my 4 year old son was on board, but this made no difference to him. It is obvious to me that his mind is incapable of processing common sense commands. This dangerous individual needs to know that he will one day be stopped. He cannot be allowed to put the safety of others at risk through his mindless attitude to driving. But he is of course just one of many idiots of the same mind-set making our roads here a dangerous game of chance for law abiding drivers. I'm watching you and you will be stopped.

Recollections 3 (1986)

1986 was the year of the Domesday Project. It was also for me a year of childhood fear and the unknown.
I knew that we could all be blown up but I didn't know why or by who. I know it was something no one wanted to talk about very much. I know my parents never spoke about it unless I forced them to, but they never acknowledged the fact that we were living in the most volatile period since the Second World War and that much was being made of something called 'MAD' and cruise missiles. There were always pictures on the TV news with women holding hands around wire fences, sometimes fighting with police or being dragged into the back of police vans. I didn't know why - I just though it was normal. In fact most of the decade was spent asking 'what if' and this was fueled by a plethora of films designed to terrify young and old. Just take 'Threads' from 1984...
My curiosity was rewarded when I met a chap from the local CND campaign group. He explained to me what could happen to us if we continued on the course we were on and he convinced me that nuclear weapons were a bad thing. I remember vividly being discovered by my mum and being dragged away while she accused the chap of brainwashing me. In fact, he had told me the truth and more than I had ever been told by my parents or by anyone else around me. From that point, I was convinced that we lived in a mad, bad world and that we could all be blown to pieces in an instant.

Another big event in 1986 was of course the Chernobyl accident. I do remember the news reports and being haunted by the images of the destroyed reactor and the men sent to clear up in the aftermath. Little did I know that they were living their final hours. The news reached us late. By the time it was on the Nine O'Clock News, a radioactive plume was already over a large part of Western Europe. I know not quite understanding what had gone on but looking back, I do question the decision to send me and others to school as normal the following morning. I say this because we know that large swathes of Scottish grazing pasture has been contaminated for years to come by the radiation released from Chernobyl. So what exactly was in the air above us while we made our way to and from school and played on the field? We'll of course probably never know.

I'm a little angry I think. I'm angry at my parents for not talking about these topics. Maybe they knew and simply didn't want to discuss it. Perhaps it would be discussed when I was tucked up in bed, hearing only faint muffled voices through the floorboards. Or maybe they just didn't know. Thanks to so called 'freedom of information' we know that right up until 1991, huge underground cities were kept at a state of readiness. We know that Royal Observer Corps posts up and down the country were continually staffed and linked by a secondary telephone system designed to function in time of war. I know this to be true as I've worked with those who looked after it.

I know it has been remarked that we live in a more dangerous world. But is there the fear nowadays that enveloped society back in the 1980's? Surely nowadays we live in a more open society, some would say a free-er society. Is the fear of the unknown what really makes the world a dangerous place? We know more now than we ever did back then. We relied solely on the media - the TV and printed word. Basically we were fed fear by our government - and it worked. For me, I am more fearful of that period now. I look back and wonder how exactly we managed to emerge from that period unscathed - it's nothing short of a miracle.

I will one day tell my son of those days. I can as I have a greater knowledge of what I was seeing and hearing at the time. I now understand - I didn't then. Those who did know, didn't want to tell.
One thing's for sure, 1986 was for me a year of knowing we weren't safe. It was a year of secrets, radioactive clouds and silence. 1986 is a year I am able to live now, today, with the knowledge I needed then. I now know 1986... and I wish I didn't.

Domesday Reloaded

Today the BBC have unveiled 'Domesday Reloaded'. I expect few people will remember the Domesday Project of the mid-80's. I do. It was a project headed by the BBC to record what life was like in the UK during 1986. It involved many thousands of people contributing articles and photographs, all of which was put together into a vast electronic library and written to laser disc. Unfortunately the cost of the machines needed to play the discs placed the Domesday records out of the reach of most people except the odd school, library or museum. But now, the data has been converted to today's standards and it has all been released on the Internet for all to enjoy - 25 years after it was produced.
I do remember the hype surrounding it and I also remember our school submitting material for it. It was a big event but back then I didn't realise just how important it was. It was something the grown-ups were doing. I do recall not longer after, seeing BBC Micro computers springing up in libraries and I recall seeing one at our central library down in Bromley - where I grew up. Of course by todays standards, it was basic but back then it was way ahead of its time and cutting-edge.

I've had a browse through it online and I'm amazed at what has been captured. Unlike a typical reference site, the information is made up of small articles. They are all written in a very basic format - as if by youngsters and provide a vaulable nugget of information for any place in the UK during 1986. The photo above shows Raglan Road, the road in which I went to school. The houses are typical of where I lived and grew-up.



It is all the more fantastic as all the articles are based on random everyday things. One such article reads;

We found that most of the shops
that are in Chatterton Road do not
sell food. Some of the older people
that we interviewed said that they did
all their shopping here because you
can buy everything you need and it is
such a friendly place.
Some we interviewed said that they
found the shops a little more
expensive than in Bromley ad so they
did their main shopping at large
supermarkets nearby.
In Chatterton Road there are four
takeaway food shops, a chemist and
Post Office in the same building and a
supermarket. There are several shops
which sell household goods and car
accessorioes. There are quite a few
service shops such as an estate
agent, two hairdressers, dry cleaners,
travel agents and hire shops.
The road is often very busy.

For instance, the M25 is mentioned as being not quite complete. The A17 bypass near to where I live hadn't been built and the subsequent traffic through the village of Long Sutton is mentioned.
It really is an amazing accomplishment and I take my hat off to all involved.
Another wonderfully written article gives a view of public transport in Bromley at the time...

Our transport these days in London 10th
July 1985 is not very good.The
transport takes too long to come_
that's buses.They are always late and
when they come the buses are packed and
they say only one on top sometimes.
The old people sometimes have to go up-
stairs and when their not even half way
up he rings the bell and they could
easily fall and hurt themselves.And
when somebody's running for the bus the
conductor does see him or her and rings
the bell so that the bus goes.Some
people jump on the bus and they could
easily fall and hurt themselves.On the
rectangled buses there are 28 seats
downstairs.And they let them still
stand on the bus.

So wonderful. This is another example of a genuine article;

Today 1985 their is alot of electric
equipment about. eg televisions, light,
microwave ovens. I will explain which
each one is about:
TELEVISION: This is a form of
entertainment. Actors and actresses
perform; films, soap operas, music
plays, series, and things like that.
Television has been around for about
since the 1950's.
MICROWAVE AND OTHER COOKING EQUIPMENT:
Microwave is a oven but this cooks
food quicker. A kettle is something
you boil a cup of tea or hot drink in.
Oven's and hobbs are something that you
cook your meals in. soda stream is a
fizzy drink's maker. Mr Frosty is a
milk shake maker, there are lots more
kitchen appliances but they are not so
well known.
VIDEO: A Video is connected to the
television and it can record things

I recommend a visit to this unique window on our past: http://www.bbc.co.uk/history/domesday