Paralympic Welcome, Tentative York & Longing for Security

Once again, we produced an epic opening ceremony, this time for the Paralympic Games. Though not on quite the same scale as the Olympic opening ceremony, it was nonetheless fully attended and watched by millions across the country. Channel 4 have the broadcast rights to the Paralympics and though their coverage was very good, much criticism has been made of the decision to include numerous advertisement breaks during the event. Twitter was awash with comments deploring Channel 4 for the decision and I have to admit that I was one of those contributing to the protests. Being one of the largest and most significant events Channel 4 has broadcast since it launched in 1982, I would really have expected the channel to forgo the revenue from the numerous car ads in favour of showing the whole event uninterrupted.
For me, the event was very moving. The sight of hundreds of disabled athletes, proud to be representing their countries and being celebrated was magnificent. The choreography was world class and complimented with a commentary by Stephen Hawking. The athletes were proud the be there, and it showed.

Tomorrow, we had hoped to be taking our son to York for the first time. My wife and I have been to York on a couple of occasions and have enjoyed it very much. There's something about the place that you can't quite put your finger on, but I do have a particular fondness for the history, architecture and of course the wonderful Railway Museum.
I've mentioned before the prohibitive cost of rail travel and the return fare being £145 for the three of us. Now, to me this seems expensive. Perhaps I'm simply out of touch with current public transport costs. But when I compare this to the cost of travelling by car, about £35, it really does seem excessive. We are rather hoping that my in-laws will lend us the money until my expenses arrive for my NHS work. This would allow us to get there and back, and a packed lunch would negate the need to buy food. It's touch and go at the moment whether we'll go or not but if we're able to, I know my son will love it.

I've written about having to keep a diary noting activities and my anxiety and depression levels. This is for the CBT therapy I'm having in Spalding. I'm a little concerned that when I have my next session on the 18th September (when my therapist returns from her holiday to Mexico), there won't be a great deal for her to analyse. I've actually been feeling quite good for the last few weeks. I certainly haven't had any depressive episodes and my anxiety levels have been pretty much level. This may be due to the fact that I'm finding things to occupy me, or simply that there haven't been any triggers to set me off. The one constant thing on my mind is the Bank and whether they will allow us to continue contributing to the mortgage. I worry daily that there will either be a letter or phone call requesting me to contact them. If and when it comes, I will need to ask them to extend the period further. My biggest fear is that they will say no. I may be worrying for no reason as I've been told by so many people that provided we are paying something, they cannot do anything and as the house value is decreasing, they are unlikely to try to turf us out to sell on. Common sense tells me this is the likely outcome but I still worry. At least this time round I can tell them I am officially an NHS Volunteer, so I'm doing something productive. Although I'm not being paid anything - just my expenses - I am hopeful that it will develop into something permanent. Working in some kind of mental health support role within the NHS is my current aim. The question is how long we can survive for until something happens?

Remembering

It is of course a special day, one of those days that will always exist. And that's important, for we are a country of tradition after all. In a way, it's the tradition and routine that holds everything together. In this time of turmoil and worry, the traditions and events we hold dear somehow serve to keep everything together. A sort of glue that keeps everything in its place.
I really think that in tough times, we turn to tradition and the things that are really important for support. It's something to grab hold of and hold onto in tough times.
I am always moved by the events that mark our period of remembrance here in the UK. We do things well here. We may not be the best at making things any more and our industries are a mere shadow of what they used to be, but we are certainly masters of ceremony.
It is fair to say that the act of remembrance this year is perhaps far stronger than ever. The recent conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan have added to the list of fallen young men and women and those who have been wounded, some severely. I can never begin to understand what it would be like to lose someone close, but I do know that it would be impossible to carry on if anything happened to my son. The loss is enormous and total in its effect.
For the first time in many years, I do feel the young people of today are able to relate more closely to these events. They are not just remembering those who gave their lives in the past conflicts and World Wars, often symbolised by old sepia worn photographs, but they are remembering many not much older than themselves lost in the current fields of conflict. The losses are not just from a time of long ago, they are current.
Lest we forget...