School Mornings

Don't know where my text has disappeared to. I had typed about school mornings and how I enjoy taking my son each day.
I'm one of the few dads that's about to take their children to school. I might as well wear a sign saying I'm out of work and have nothing else to do with my time. I do enjoy it though. There's always an anxious wait for the bell to ring - I'm actually more anxious than my son. The children then go and line up, my son like a little soldier standing to attention. My son shows no fear. He's confident and happy to be there. But there is a boy in his class for whom every morning is a nightmare. He clings to his mum and sobs his heart out. She disappears into the classroom with him while the rest of us wave at our kids until they have disappeared into the darkness. For her it must be heartbreaking. It's upsetting to watch and I'm thankful that our son is the complete opposite.
As a youngster, I feared school. I would do all I could to stay at home. I do wish my son would befriend this little chap. Perhaps that would help him become more confident. Such a shame though.
My wife and I aren't part of the 'in crowd' so we don't drawn into the little clusters of parents that form in the playground each morning. They are friendly toward us but perhaps it's the fact we live in a different part of the street or we have a different type of house that sets us apart. There are one or two who do like to converse with us. We have such a short walk to and from the school that it isn't really possible to talk about anything substantial. But for the most part, we keep to ourselves and speak only if we're spoken to.
So weekday mornings are like this. I'm fortunate I suppose that being out of work does have this small benefit. I will certainly miss it if I ever do manage to return to work. I will miss the hand holding and the anticipation of what the day might hold. I will miss that father-son hug and the confidence of knowing that he went to school happy. But I know that all too soon, this opportunity will end and I will be in a car on the way to work or even worse, staring at a computer in an office. I simply don't know at the moment. For what I want to do seems as far away as ever and will need a miracle if it is ever to become reality.
For my son though, I suspect and hope that things will be different. He has the confidence I lacked and this will take him to great places. But before he begins that journey, he needs to be able to put his shoes on the right feet. It doesn't seem to bother him though... Happy days.

A glorious Sunday

A bright, sunnny and warm day. Unusual? Yep, but very welcome. It's amazing the effect a little sunshine has on people. Clothes become scant and outlandish, tops come off cars and people behave differently, some deciding to drive like complete twats. The sun and the heat also brings out the flies, the wasps and the bees
but it's a small price to pay. My wife hates bees and wasps. I have to deal with these. She handles the things with eight legs, much to my relief. The weather also brings out he barbeque. In recent years, this has become a very British phenomenan so much so it wouldn't surprise me if we had overtaken the Australians in the popularity stakes. My in-laws are particularly fond of them. The weather has had an odd effect on me today. Well I'm blaming the weather anyway. It should have had a positive effect, but it did exactly the opposite. I felt awful with a head feeling like it was being squeezed. Quite why I felt under so much pressure is a mystery. I have the same worries and uncertainties plaguing my every day. Normally these are kept under the surface, but not today. Something was different. Talk about re-painting the outside of the house did nothing to improve things. How can I consider making the house look better if we won't be in it next year? Give me security and I will devote every spare minute I have to it. Security equals confidence. Confidence equals motivation...