A Red Warning & When Asking Advice Isn't Always the Best Thing...

There's no denying it, it's cold... very cold. Group today was not very well attended though I suspect the weather is just one of the reasons for staying away.
The drive to Spalding was without event, apart from having to stop once or twice for the screen wash nipplets to thaw out. Luckily I'd had the sense a couple of days ago to fill it with concentrate.

View looking towards Gedney Church from A17

Tomorrow looks set to be dicey. There are warnings of heavy snow for most of the UK and the highest level red warning has been issued by the Met Office. Thankfully I don't need to venture out tomorrow and I made sure I collected a couple bags of firewood on the way home today, so I should be OK.

A friend is looking for a new car and we were asked our views and advice at Group on a particular model she had seen. Having the laptop with me, I looked it up on the What Car? website. The ratings were not very good. It scored just one star for reliability and quality and the same for its interior and features. This didn't go down very well and I did wonder whether it is practicable to ask someone their views and advice when buying something as big as a car. I know from experience that ratings and reviews are normally the last thing one consults when buying a vehicle. Often, we are sold on looks and appearance failing to take into account miles per gallon and ride comfort. As well as the crass reviews, the garage she was intending to buy it from was also lampooned.
The whole thing left me wondering if I would seek advice when deciding to buy a new car. I soon came to the conclusion that I would not, preferring to trust my own instinct and experience. After all I've never had a bad experience buying a car and they've always lasted a few years without major incident.
Sometimes it can be highly beneficial to invite the views of others. But there are occasions when some things should be handled alone.

Fixed It!

This will seem relatively trivial to many but I've been meaning to do something about an irritating problem we've had with the car. The indicators have for several weeks worked only intermittently requiring a sharp whack to the dashboard at junctions etc. A temporary solution for the last week has been to stuff a rolled up piece of paper between the little box of tricks that does the indicating and the next one. Yesterday I decided to do something about it. Having looked on eBay, it is possible to purchase a new one, but why spend £20 when I could fix the one we have. I was pretty certain the problem had to be a loose connection inside the relay itself, as it worked perfectly well when the correct pressure was applied.
Removing it was very easy, it simply plugs into a board and has three pins that fit into a socket, similar to a domestic three pin plug. I have all the gear I need at my mate's and removing the cover revealed a simple device that clicks on and off when power is applied. These are commonly referred to as solenoids. It wasn't long before I'd identified the problem. There are three soldered joints and these had worked themselves loose probably through the natural movement of the car over time.

Three dabs of solder on the affected joints and the relay was as good as new and working fine. A simple fix with enormous benefit.

Kindle & Car In Harmony

A Little Job & Olympic Worries

I've had a couple of small jobs come my way this week. A work colleague of my mum-in-law has a laptop with a faulty keyboard. It's a strange one this, as all the keys work except for J,K and L. I've taken the keyboard out and taken a closer look but unlike laptops of old, there is literally nothing that's serviceable. They keys do come off, but that's it apart from the contact sheet underneath. So I've recommended a replacement which to my surprise will cost just £25 to procure. Computer spares must be the only things that have actually decreased in price over the years. The same customer has a tower unit which 'blue screens' on starting which could frankly be a number of different things so I'll be taking a look at it once the laptop is repaired.
So that's all very good. I do love fixing things especially computers and if I can earn a little by doing it, then happy days.

Weather, oh weather. It has been nothing short of horrible for the last two weeks. It all came to a peak last night when we had very heavy rain and strong winds, which persisted well into today and have only really eased in the last hour or so. There are flood warnings almost everywhere at the moment and there are rivers where their banks have already burst, such as in York. Yet we are told we still have a drought. So why not try to collect some of this water, the same way I am in my garden, but on an industrial scale?

In the news we've had the Leveson Inquiry and the furore surrounding the Culture, Media and Sport Minister Jeremy Hunt. I've certainly been glued to the coverage surrounding this and I firmly believe that there remain many questions to be answered and I believe there are rough times ahead for the current government. I could spend an hour or more writing about my thoughts on this subject, but I won't. Suffice to say that I believe not one word of what we are told by our government or Mr Murdoch, regardless of how plausible their explanations and excuses may seem. They may think we were all born yesterday but I for one am not going to be taken in by it, not a single word of it.

Twitter. I've written on numerous occasions regarding the power of Twitter and its influence on our society is clear given the media coverage it has received lately. Admittedly, the coverage has been for the wrong reasons and unfortunately, it is all too often used as a weapon to offend or humiliate.
But I do see it very much as a tool for making comment and observation, and on many occasions over the last week, I have received replies and even had my tweets read out on radio. I already have over 100 followers, to my surprise and how many of these read my tweets, I do not know. But the fact that my tweets regarding electricity providers were picked up by Eon and NPower and my tweet regarding the mis-treatment of Christopher Tappin was read out on-air by LBC, it does make me feel good about using this relatively new medium. What started out just a couple of years ago as an Internet SMS service has grown into perhaps the most powerful tool of communication and opinion in the World today.

No week would be complete without a crisis and this time it was a flat tyre. I had spotted it just before my wife was due to leave for work. Of course it was all too much for her but we managed to get someone to come and collect her. I managed to get some air into the tyre and drove gingerly to the local garage. Within half an hour they had located the puncture and repaired it. Wonderful, and all for just £20. A huge relief given the fact I was expecting to pay £40 for a new tyre. So a major crisis was averted thank goodness.

There is concern at the moment regarding the ability of our immigration control services to cope come the Olympics and the predicted hundreds of thousands of extra visitors. This has arisen after complaints by entering passengers who had to queue for up to 3 hours at Heathrow. Mobile phone footage showed long queues of disgruntled passengers and I can't help but imagine the scene in three months from now when Olympic devotees begin descending on the capital.
We are being assured that the airports are prepared for the influx, buy haven't we heard all thins before? Do they really know how many people are expected? I doubt it. I fully expect to see huge queues at our airports, caused in part by delays in processing passports and in the inability of our transport system to transfer the masses to the Olympic site.
Somewhat amazingly, there is discussion at the moment regarding the siting of ground to air missiles and the surreal suggestion to place missile batteries on top of apartment blocks and other tall buildings. We are being assured a complete no fly zone will be enforced over London during the Games, but mistakes do happen and I could easily see a situation where a plane or other airborne object could stray and a missile be launched in response. The results of this would be catastrophic for anyone below.
And of course there's the hoaxer and the chaos that would ensue following any warning deemed credible.
Of course, there's every possibility the whole thing will pass without incident, and I hope it does. But I do have serious doubts as to whether the current infrastructure will cope under the additional strain and I seriously doubt our preparedness. Time will of course tell.

An Icy Blast

We're being told to prepare for some nasty weather. An icy blast is on its way from the East and from about Wednesday the temperature is set to plummet. There's the real chance of some proper snow too, so it doesn't look as if winter is quite done with us yet. After all, we have had it pretty good so far with one of the warmest winters on record.
We have a new car and my mood has lifted finally. I've actually quite warmed to it. It's a Citroen Saxo, blue and really rather nice. OK it's not the sort of car I would have chosen and it does lack some features such as air conditioning and power steering. But it does have a sunroof and given its tiny engine, it really is quite sprightly. I've driven it a couple of times and it does take a little getting used to, but it's no great hardship.
We've started this week with my wife feeling very poorly. It started last night and she had a very restless sleep waking this morning with aching joints, a temperature and very little energy. As I type this she is lying on the sofa next to me in her Slanket fast asleep. She was to have helped out today at my son's school swimming trip but I had to call them earlier to tell them she was too unwell to attend. There is a nasty sickness and diarrhoea bug doing the rounds at the moment and they've had a lot of children off school because of it.
I'm really hoping I'll hear something this week regarding a couple of jobs I've applied for online. They are local and are both IT Support/Service Desk roles. It's all stuff I've done before so nothing too taxing.
I do feel a lot better than I have done the last few days. I really sank to a very low point and I know it caused my wife a lot of stress and worry. It's hard to explain why it happens and how I feel when it does. It's not something I have any control over though I'm sure people assume it's something I can turn on and off, but I can't. That's not how it works. I wonder sometimes if it would be easier on everyone if I disappear somewhere whenever a bout hits. I know I'm impossible to live with but it's important to me that someone's there for me when I eventually come out the other side. I fear that one day there won't be anyone, and that scares me a bit.
I have my first CBT session tomorrow in Spalding. I don't really know what to expect so I'll keep an open mind. On Thursday, I have an appointment with my doctor. My wife is coming with me this time.

Woes

My wife left for work in the car this morning for the final time. She

will be taking it to the mechanic tonight with her dad and we're hoping

he'll give us something to take it off our hands. It's all very sad. I

hate to see a car go. It's over ten years old and holds so many

memories for us. If it was in any way possible, we'd keep it, but there

simply isn't the money.

To compound things, my in-laws are blaming me for what's gone on. They

don't say so much in words, but I know what they think and I know they

blame me for the dire financial situation we're in. They are forking

out the money for a replacement car, but it is clear to me that they

don't wish to involve me so I am keeping well out of it. It is there

money and until we can pay them back - which won't be until April at

present - it will be their car. I don't even want to drive it. It's

purpose is to get my wife to and from work. I will somehow find a way

to manage with the bus. It does run to here even though we're remote

but it's one of those services you need to book well in advance. It

doesn't run to any kind of timetable but it is supposed to meet the

main services to Spalding and King's Lynn. I really don't mind using it

provided I don't end up stranded anywhere for too long.

All this has sent me into a major bout of depression, the worst I have

known in a long time. I lack energy and enthusiasm and in the evenings

I just want to go to bed. I also lack any appetite for food and frankly

typing this has taken every ounce of my will power.

I called my Mum last night to tell her the car would be going this

evening. It means that she too will have to rely entirely on the bus

service as I used to see her on a Friday and take her into town every

Saturday morning. I also won't be able to visit my dear friend to help

with his model railway layout. This has always been my escape and

refuge from the stresses and strains of life currently. It was a place

where I could think and feel almost free from everything. They'll

understand I'm sure.

I will certainly be steering well clear of my in-laws. I was to have

gone with them tonight to hand over the car, but I really don't feel

like being anywhere near them. I know what they think and how they feel

about me. The way they are with me speaks volumes and I just wish so

much to be able to tell them all where to go. They have absolutely no

understanding of what I've been through, and continue to have to deal

with on a near daily basis. They will never understand and will remain

ignorant. I just wish that some kind of good fortune would come our way

so we can no longer have to be dependent on others, especially them. I

hate the fact that we've had to borrow money from them. I really hate

it. Something has to change.

Car Troubles

Firstly, the weather. What a miserable grey, wet and cold day it has been. Really awful and it did nothing for my mood today. It was lifted slightly this morning when I met again with my fellow sufferers at our support group meeting. We actually managed to have a laugh which was good and we all felt the better for it. For two hours I was away from the problems and the worries, amongst friends and safe from harm. The reality of everything soon hit once I got home and the fact that we are faced with losing our (only) car by the end of the week. The mechanic we use had been trying to reach me on my mobile all morning. He'd estimated that we would need £400 to get the car into a fit enough state to pass its MOT. That is certainly more than we wanted to spend and frankly it is money best spent on a replacement. The guy mentioned he'd be interested in taking the car off our hands so that's what we'll do. The little we get for it can be put towards something new.
It's all causing much stress and anxiety. We're so reliant on having a car, living remotely as we do it is our only real source of viable transport. We could happily make do with something electric and do our bit for the environment. We don't drive very far and it would be ideal for just popping to the shops and dropping my wife at work. It'll be years I suspect until that becomes an option, we're far too reliant on fossil fuels and the cost remains prohibitive for most people, even the wealthy. I'm really not in a good place at the moment...

Arse!

My previous optimism has been obliterated. The car failed its MOT in spectacular fashion. Of the list of items it was failed on, the steering rack tops it and with the car worth just £300 at most, it probably isn't worth paying for the repairs. Today has been miserable. I hate the waiting and today I passed the time by working on the train layout. Despite having a couple of shed heaters, it was freezing cold in there. In fact I'm still thawing out five hours on.
My wife is distraught and very depressed. We secretly knew the car would probably fail but expected it to be the brake pads. Instead we have a long list of things including brake pipes, springs and a lot of welding. It can all be done, and the car will certainly pass the MOT but at huge cost. I'll find out tomorrow exactly how much but if it's more than £300 then we'll be looking for a new car. The guy we take the car to has told me he'd be interested in buying the car from us. After all, it has four new tyres and a host of spares he can make use of. So hopefully the money he gives us for it combines with the amount we have set aside will finance a replacement run-around.
It's all just the latest thing in a long, long run of bad luck. Who was I kidding to suggest that their would be nothing wrong with the car? Myself I think. I wanted to believe that we'd get away with just the fee for the MOT and almost convinced myself of it. I think my wife believed my reassurances a little too much. The reality is that whatever you believe, it will normally be ten times worse. If you think it will take an hour or two, it will be more like thee or four. If you think they'll call you, they won't. You'll end up chasing them. This is the reality sadly and trying to remain positive is often the biggest mistake you can make. Arse!

Car Worries & Other Stuff

The car is going in for its MOT tomorrow morning. No matter how much I try to reassure myself that it's running fine and has nothing wrong with it, I'm resigned to the fact that there's probably something nasty lurking under the bonnet or something worn out that we can't see. There's money set aside just in case, but as normal it's money we've borrowed. I just know it's going to be a nightmare of a day. A friend is following me there and taking me back to theirs until the car is ready to collect again. My wife will be at home nervously awaiting my phone call to let her know the outcome. Whatever happens, we'll have to deal with it. It's not that it's a flash expensive car. Far from it. I used to own and drive nice cars and spend literally hundreds on MOT's and services. I look back now and cringe at the huge amounts of money I wasted. Now of course things are very different. We drive a basic little car. It isn't the cleanest, it isn't the fastest and it certainly isn't the biggest. But it gets us from A to B relatively inexpensively. Above all, it's reliable, very reliable. It starts first time whatever the weather.
So it's pointless worrying. We're fortunate to know the guy doing the MOT quite well and he knows the car. He's also honest. I know this to be true.

A busy Sunday. My son had a party today at the Funfarm in Spalding. It's a very popular venue and takes all the hassle out of arranging and hosting children's parties. The kids love it and the parents can sit in relative comfort whilst keeping a watcfull eye on their offspring. The allocated two hours is plenty, for the kids and the adults. Definately.

I'll write soon about music. I need to be in the right frame of mind and I'm currently stressed. I enjoy listening to a varied range of music, modern and old. But what's important for me and I suspect many others are the things that we associate to the music. The things we remember when we listen and the emotions certain tracks seem to trigger. I always treat music as a type of medicine or drug. It can have an enormous effect on mood, which for some is a very useful thing.

Something new, and I'm going to journal my viewing habits. I watch a lot of TV and much of it is obtained via the Internet. So here goes, and it's by no means an exhaustive list.

Stuff I've been watching...

Sherlock (BBC1 and current series now finished)
Bones (fantastic series from the US and downloaded via wonderful BitTorrent)
Criminal Minds (ditto)
Grim (ditto)
Rizzoli and Isles (ditto)
Person of Interest (ditto)
Call the Midwife (BBC)
Celebrity Coach Trip (Channel 4)
Idiot Abroad (Sky)
Dancing On Ice (ITV1)

Last film I've watched...

Hangover 2 - not as good as the first but still funny. I'd give it 8/10.

Stuff I'm eagerly awaiting...

Whitechapel (ITV1)

Stuff I'm listening to...

The Archers (of course)
Dad's Army (original radio series)
Sherlock Holmes - The House of Silk (BBC Radio)

So there we are. I suppose I'm a bit of a media junkie!