A Stressful Day, A Wasted Trip & Andrew Lyons

A stressful day. I attended a rather subdued Group meeting this morning which was thankfully made more cheerful by the arrival of Harry and Harriet, our local Pets As Therapy dogs and their handlers. There were once again relatively few attendees and I'm inclined to blame the weather for their non-appearance.
The journey to Spalding this morning was again made in freezing conditions, this time compounded by thick fog and ice. It looks as if we are in for a prolonged period of freezing temperatures though the snow does seem to have abated.

Speaking on non-appearance, I yesterday afternoon attended what I believed to be a meeting held at Lincolnshire NHS offices at Bracebridge Heath. The meeting had been scheduled for 4pm and its purpose was to informally discuss how we all felt about the future of mental health support in the wake of Andrew Harrison's tragic death. How surprised was I then to find on arrival that I was the only one attending and that the meeting had evidently been cancelled. I have sent an email to the organiser but I have yet to receive a reply.

Today had been allocated by my wife for us to contact the council regarding our council tax payments and our electricity provider Eon regarding the ridiculous amount they are changing for our lighting and heating.
I had been dreading the prospect of having to speak with them but thankfully my wife had dealt with the council before I arrived home from Group. I find more and more that my anxiety kicks in and frankly makes me feel quite ill. I much prefer to type letters. It is one of the few things I am still able to do with any level of confidence.
I finally mustered the courage and explained our situation to the chap in their call centre. To his credit, he was actually quite helpful and having explained that there was no way we could afford to pay £360 per month, he set about changing our payment arrangement. This still leaves the £800 odd debt we've somehow managed to accrue since joining them last year. This still needs to be resolved and a complaint has been raised with a dedicated team who should be contacting us in a couple of days time. Of particular concern is how our monthly energy consumption could have leaped from £126 to £196 and why they emptied our bank account at the beginning of January to pay off some of what we owed - without consulting us beforehand. This may sound minor and trivial to many but when you have very little or no income, it's pretty major.

Suicide is in the news again. The BBC have an article on their news site which highlights the increase in the number of people taking their own lives. This is tragic and sad, but not unexpected. I've written at length about how stress, depression and their causes such as debt, redundancy and the squeeze on living standards caused by Government policy is making life unbearable for many. An increasing number are being pushed to the limit, and in some cases, beyond.
In my local newspaper, the Spalding Guardian, I see that there was another successful suicide attempt in Spalding. The body of Andrew Lyons, aged just 33 was discovered next to the railway line. What drove Andrew to this act is unknown but it is a sad fact that more and more people in their 30's are choosing the ultimate way out and freedom from the pain and misery of debt and redundancy. Why? is something many will be asking. Was help available to Andrew or had he sought help? IS there anything anyone could have done to make his situation easier or provide hope, enough for him to see that there is a reason for carrying on? Perhaps we'll never know, but Andrew is a reminder to us all of how suicide is difficult to predict and to prevent in someone determined enough.
I always feel anger when something like this happens. I feel angry that no one was able to help. I feel angry that Andrew felt so desperate and alone, that his problems couldn't be resolved or worked out. If help had been provided and there was hope, what would Andrew have become and achieved in his life? Whatever pushed Andrew to the limit and beyond could have been made easier with support and help from others, particularly those who have been where Andrew had been, people who understand how it is to feel there is no way out of a situation and to make the ultimate choice. People like this are in a unique position to empathise and provide the support needed to convince someone like Andrew that there is another way out. When someone is depressed and at their wits end, it is impossible to see, but it is there, of this I am convinced. If only...
My Moodscope score today is 47%