Today is the first day of Winter. The clocks went back last night 1 hour and you get that strange feeling as if the time isn't right each time you look at the clock. It'll take a while to get used to but we'll all have to get used to the darker late afternoons for some time to come. This year though, Winter seems to fill people with dread. We've been warned to expect a severe Winter with snow, ice and cold. Problem is, it's still quite mild. We're being tricked into a false sense of security and the snow and ice will no doubt catch us all out again - as it seems to every year despite the warnings and countless predictions. Maybe it's what it is to be British...?
I find myself using analogies quite a lot, especially to describe situations. I find them very useful and an excellent way of enabling others to understand. For instance, I would describe my current situation as being likened to a train heading towards the buffers at the end of a long line. Each day, the buffers draw closer and the train shows no sign of slowing down. A set of points could save the train if they switched, but they don't. An injection of cash or a win of some kind could slow the train or stop it completely, but it doesn't. Or the buffers could be removed and replaced with more track, in effect giving me more time. I love analogies.
It's Hallowe'en tomorrow. It's the latest 'festival' to become over commercialised here in the UK. I'm amazed at how much has appeared in the shops aimed at youngsters - costumes, make-up, black cats, broomsticks, pumpkins and decorations. We bought my son a witches costume the other day. He's going to wear it tomorrow afternoon and visit family. I expect they will make a fuss of it at school tomorrow. Oh how his week off has flown by... It will soon be firework night and already rockets can be heard in the evening popping in the distance. As if anyone has the spare cash to spend on them. Apparently my in-laws are planning a firework party of sorts next weekend. They did one last year which was quite pleasant. Of course it's all for the youngsters really but I do confess to enjoying it somewhat.
In the news this last week has been Europe and a rescue plan to prevent the Euro from going bust. A vote for an EU referendum was quashed earlier in the week which could have seen a vote for whether we stay in the EU. And the week ended with the very sad news that Sir Jimmy Savile had passed away. For many youngsters nowadays, he will mean little to them but for me and many others my age, Jimmy Savile was part of our Saturday evening for many a year. The opening and closing credits of Jim'll Fix It symbolised fish fingers, crispy pancakes or perhaps bath-time for so many youngsters wishing that perhaps one day their dreams would come true and that someone would fix it for them.
I've watched Night Mail and I am now watching Terminus while I type this. I say watching it, it's playing on another monitor to the side of me. Terminus is one of the most fantastic films ever made and launched its director John Schlessinger into his prestigious film career.
My son is making cakes and they are now beginning to bake in the oven. What a wonderful smell...
I may be heading toward teaching. My lack of sufficient funds prevent me from gaining my PSV license and I really am well and truly stuck in a rut at the moment. I have been contacted by RDS who provide courses for would-be teachers and this may be a route I will take. As I may have mentioned before now, teaching is just about the only other thing I can see myself doing with any confidence. I've done a little in the past and really enjoyed it. The problem nowadays is the requirement for recognised teaching qualifications regardless of what experience or skills you possess.
I am adding a large extension to my friend's train layout. The plan is for a new branch line to circle a harbour and fishing village. The line will rise steadily until it is high enough to cross an existing line and then be carried on a bridge across a small town eventually connecting with the other end of the layout. I can't help but wonder if I've bitten off more than I can chew with this one. It's certainly ambitious and I've no idea if it will work.
I do enjoy my time working on the layout. It takes me away briefly from the stresses and strains of reality. It's a means of escape and I can immerse myself in the world of OO and 1/76th scale models. More importantly for me, it's something I have built and it's something I'm proud of.
The thoughts, ramblings and musings of a 'man with a plan' to change his life from one of a high paid professional to something completely different... I write about my struggle to achieve this and my work with those affected by anxiety & depression
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Lynda Bellingham
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